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Get back with your ex girlfriend? How to start with a clean slate

Are you finally back with your ex girlfriend? Congratulations! By now you know that getting an ex back can be a very difficult task. But guess that? Now comes the hard part: making the relationship work this time.

By getting your ex back, you have already made progress in making him miss you and need you again. Keeping your girlfriend after you win her back will depend on what you do next. The only thing you have against you is a history of breakups. To move forward, you need to put this past behind you as quickly and firmly as possible, so that the two of you can focus on creating a future together.

Let go of the mistakes of the past

It doesn’t matter why you two broke up, each of you needs to let go of past mistakes, and not just yours, but your ex girlfriend’s mistakes. It’s very likely that she did things to hurt you, just as you might have done to hurt her. But the good news is that they have decided to get back together. They are already committed to giving themselves a second chance. Even if it’s something as bad as cheating, you can move past the pain and betrayal by accepting the fact that you’ve chosen to create a New relationship with your ex girlfriend, instead of trying to fix the old one.

sit down to heal old wounds

When you two went your separate ways, it was for a reason. They both had issues with each other that could have driven them apart; don’t feel bad, this happens in all relationships or marriages. Instead of criticizing others on these many topics, choose the select few that are most important. Sit down calmly and maturely to air your grievances and to discuss past issues that might have caused your relationship to end. Getting back together with the ex girlfriend tag requires you to LISTEN when your ex talks. Be aware of her feelings and try to take any constructive criticism of your behavior with a grain of salt. Be open to letting her tell you what she felt was wrong with the romance…and she’ll be open to the same thing when it’s her turn to talk about it. But to put these things on the table and discuss them without confrontation, without blame? You are taking giant steps to get back together with your ex and start from scratch.

let bygones be bygones

Once you’ve got everything out of sight, push it all to one side. Visually imagine those problems that you two had sitting across from you at the table, and then slide them to the floor with a wave of your arm. These are issues that you two are leaving in the past. By agreeing to get back together, you agree that they no longer need to be addressed. It will no longer be acceptable to bring them up during arguments, fights, or general disagreements; you can’t keep pointing to the past if you want a happy and constructive future together. Even if you did things that may have been very hurtful, and she did the same to you, it’s important to give yourself space for forgiveness for the overall reconciliation process.

build a new base

When a house burns down, you can’t just start building a new one. First, you need to sweep the smoking ruins of the ancient aside. When you start with a clean, fresh foundation, everything you build on it will be that much stronger. This is your new relationship, not to be confused with the old one. Getting back together with an ex girlfriend means that she has decided to give your relationship a second chance, so don’t shoot yourself in the foot by repeating things that already happened. Think new, not old. Take your girlfriend to places you’ve never been, instead of the same favorite places from your old relationship. Keeping things new and changing them? You will create all new memories to treasure, memories that will not be clouded by the mistakes of the past.

Now if you find yourself stuck on the road to getting your girlfriend back, don’t panic. There are many methods and techniques you can use to win her interest back, even if your girlfriend is the one who dumped you. In any breakup circumstance, there are ways to rekindle the feelings and emotions your ex still has for you. Learning the right and wrong ways to do this is a critical part of the reconciliation process.

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