Relationships have always fascinated me. From ‘How to create them?’ to ‘Why do they end?’ I’ve spent a lot of time trying to learn the ins and outs. One thing that is NEVER talked about is what I like to call ‘The Power of Proximity’. You never see it in the movies because it would destroy the whole “soul mate” illusion. I’m not trying to sound bitter or have anything against love, but proximity plays a HUGE importance in relationships and it’s rarely talked about and I want to discuss it today.

Basically, the power of proximity is how our location/physical distance affects relationships. It affects how they are created and how they end up. Long distance relationships NEVER work. Proximity is the main reason why. If you’re not physically close to someone or can’t spend time in someone’s company, obviously the attraction will fade. No amount of internet chatting or video calling can replace the face-to-face, skin-to-skin contact of real life.

I remember that from my high school many close relationships were formed. I remember thinking “WOW, of the other 500 million people (based on gender and age) on the planet, your ‘soulmate’ just happened to be your classmate.” I remember that at this age I became very cynical about love. It seemed so strange to me how many couples were created since high school. Maybe my school was an unknown zone and was able to beat stats like 1:500,000,000 for a dozen people.

In movies, love is often fortuitous. In real life, it’s often convenience that creates relationships. whether through classmates, work, or a friend of a friend. When you are very close to someone, bonds are formed. If you see someone at work, everyday emotional connections will develop.

Proximity also affects how often you see someone. If you live in the same city, you can meet often and further strengthen your relationship. However, if you live a couple of hours apart, cracks will start to form in the relationship due to the lack of physical contact and time spent together.

There is another aspect of proximity that I would like to mention. As I told you, and I’m sure you can think of many examples, many people at school or work create relationships with each other. These relationships, particularly from school or university fail and that is because they do not have a solid foundation. By this I mean that the fundamental reason the couple met was out of proximity and some mutual interest was expressed.

As time passes and these couples experience other aspects of life, they realize that they don’t have much in common with their partner or that “things have changed.” Imagine that you tried vanilla ice cream and you loved it. It was the only ice cream available in your town and then one day you went on vacation and there was chocolate ice cream. Despite your love for vanilla ice cream, you tried chocolate ice cream and found that you liked it even better!

Well, since there is only vanilla ice cream in your town, you will have to settle for vanilla ice cream. However, if the option of having chocolate ice cream was available in your city, it would be goodbye vanilla!

It’s not about race, just about experiencing something different. Let’s say you were in a relationship at school but then went to college in a different city or country and met some great new people. Your views and values ​​on life would surely change. It would be almost impossible for you to be happy in your old relationship. The couples at my school who are still together (for about 10 years!!) are still together because they were never apart.

What to get out of this:

Proximity is power in relationships. It is important to be physically close to someone in order to develop a relationship with them. You can be as charming and funny as you want, but if you live so far away that the relationship becomes inconvenient, then you don’t stand a chance. The greater the physical distance, the more cracks will be created in the relationship.